Are you still relying on multiple layers of clothing and winter coats to hide your extra fat or lack of muscle? It’s time to stop feeling self-conscious. There’s a guaranteed method to get you the body you desire that’s much cheaper than all the gyms around town. This method has been around since the days of your ancestors, and has been proven to be the most effective. Are you excited yet?
The method has been labeled the ‘Productive Human Being Workout’. It combines our desire to have the perfect body with the necessity of doing housework, gardening, farming, sports and other physical activities. These various activities target each specific part of the body that you could want to work on.
For arms and upper body strength, there’s cleaning the bathtub. For beginners, we recommend using a hard hairbrush, while more seasoned cleaners can try using a soft toothbrush. For best results, try tightening your muscles while you scrub, and always scrub in a circular motion. Sweeping is recommended as a good warm up or cool down for this activity. Try to use a broom that is about waist height and make sure not to bend or stoop over. Your back should always be kept straight and upright while sweeping.
Those with a garden or farm have the option of using the pickaxe method. This is great for the entire body, and also works the back muscles. As with the sweeping method, it’s important to always keep your back straight to avoid injury. Use both hands to lift the pickaxe over your head, and in one fluent motion, swing it forcefully into the earth repeatedly. It should only take you a few swings to feel the effects on your muscles.
Most women are more concerned with their lower body muscles, which could be why the most popular gym exercise amongst women is doing squats. For them, there is a better exercise: interior decoration. Take a look at your house. Don’t you think you could move things around a bit to freshen up the atmosphere? It’s better to kill two birds with one stone. Move that couch into the corner, turn that bed around, put the refrigerator beside the window and put that TV by the coffee table. While doing all this lifting, remember to keep your back straight and assume the squatting position. In cases where you need to carry items a long distance, move slowly, step by step, and keep your abs tight and chest pushed out.
Everyday, you have the opportunity to exercise using these natural methods. Whether it be housework, yard work, farming or sports, any physical activity is good for your health. Most people take these opportunities for granted and then spend a fortune on gym fees to try get in shape. There’s nothing wrong with going to the gym, but first make use of the chances life gives you every day.
self-conscious (adj.) ? uncomfortably nervous about or embarrassed by what other people think of you
seasoned (adj.) ? having a lot of experience doing something
stoop over (v) ? to bend your head and shoulders or body forward and downard
forcefully (adv.) ? with a lot of power